June is Busting

I love flowers. My friends said they knew my relationship with Ken was serious because I moved perennial flowers to Turtle Lake. One of the first to open was this short Siberian iris that opened a couple days ago Today this yellow iris opened Although fewer in number than some years, the wild daisies are starting to bloom This fragrant tree is about to bloom. A friend told me it is a hawthorn. And it …

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Has It Really Been Two Years?

This third Sunday in May two years ago I led Ken’s memorial service. It was a beautiful day, and many people came As I recall the day I remember the feelings – first, there is the gratitude at all the people who helped me I felt amazed at how many people came to share the service from so many parts of our lives People of all ages, families, people with walkers and wheelchairs. They all …

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Maple Season 2020

This season is one of transition. Loyal came and tapped trees here, hauled sap and boiled sap on Ken’s evaporator. I helped him finish and bottle the maple syrup Loyal found some filters that work better than any Ken and I had used. But after he had cleaned and hung them to dry, I had a feeling the KKK had done laundry in my kitchen. Contact Loyal if you want to buy syrup

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My Bill Holm Story

Last night I watched a show on Bill Holm, a Minnesota poet. I cried at the thought of his being dead, and cried at missing my deceased husband Ken as well. Ken and I loved Bill Holm and his work: poetry, essays, piano playing. We first saw him in nearby Amery, Wisconsin. After his performance I approached him and asked to buy the book that contained a poem he had read called Advice. I intended …

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Such Kindness

News of Ken’s death continues to filter out into the cosmos. Yesterday I received a letter from a woman who had taken a class from Ken. While reading her note tears streamed down my face. “He was not terribly personable, but I saw that he cared a lot that we were learning. The thing that stood out then, and that stuck in my mind, and that brought me to write this letter, is the way …

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Wow! I can Read Music – sort of.

I started taking music lessons about six months ago. I had never learned any music before that. I did not read music. But after practicing at least once, often twice a day (except the two days I was flying to and from visiting my parents), I had been making slow and steady progress through the book of exercises Recently I thumbed back to a couple carols in my exercises book. Then I remembered some music …

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Has It Really Been Two Years?

Today is a difficult day. Ken died December 19, 2017 around 7:30 a.m. – two years ago today. He had just returned home the night before he died. It had been a difficult night for him. After a bath with lavender oil, he never made his way back to bed. He died in his studio. At home. As deaths go it was a good one and as he wanted – at home with me and …

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As our Wedding Anniversary Approaches

Thursday is my wedding anniversary. I feel a mix of emotions: sadness and gratitude. It I am honest, I just wanted more

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The Wife

Last night I watched a video of The Wife. The depiction of the relationship moved me deeply. I thought of the relationship of couples – and my own. No, I did not make the pots, and no, I did not grow the vegetables. When the actress Glenn Close, says, ” I can fix it. Do you want me to fix it?” I was struck with my role in Ken’s life. I was a willing catalyst. …

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It Could Always Be Worse!

Last night a storm came through the area. I had checked the forecast and radar map, and I really thought it was going north of me. But then a siren went off and the news listed the county three miles east as a tornado warning Rain started pouring in the French doors on the south side of the house. I decided it was time to batten down the hatches. So, once that was done, the …

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